I'm a twenty-something, post gastric bypass, divorcee looking for love. I'm starting this blog not only to share my dating misadventures (and to provide me and my friends a good laugh for years to come), but to also document my journey of self growth, awareness, and discovery that is sure to come while looking for that perfect someone.
Guru: So tell me what's wrong here, what's missing from your diet?
Me: I know, I know...fruits and vegetables.
Guru: I know getting enough protein is critical for someone who's had gastric bypass but you really need the vitamins, minerals, and all the rest of the good stuff fruits & veggies have.
Me: It's not that I don't like them, I just have a hard time incorporating them into my diet.
Guru: Would it motivate you if I told you they will give you more energy and ,ake you look and feel healthier?
Me: I guess....maybe...
Guru: What if I told you eating fruit will attract men to you?
Me: Then I'd immediately regret not adding raspberries to my morning yogurt.
Guru: I'd also like to inform you veggies would make your excess skin disappear.
Me: Any vegetable?
Guru: No, candy corn doesn't count.
Me: Hrmm...can I still drink Dr. Pepper while eating baby carrots? Or will that cancel out the skin-disappearing benefits of eating the veggie?
Guru: You know that Dr. Pepper isn't a real doctor, right?
Guru: Ok, then we'll work on curbing your soda addiction another day.
01/14/11, via conversation